I leave South Africa in a week and feel so grateful for the time I’ve had here: all that’s transpired, been achieved and created. When I arrived in September last year, I was so emotionally and physically tired. Recovering from a separation from my husband three years earlier and cervical cancer, I knew that spiritually I was at a turning point. And, while my return to South Africa felt familiar, I had no idea where this new path might take me.
I knew I needed to come home to my roots to birth a new me; I needed to let go of the old ways that no longer served me. Like a phoenix rising from the ashes, I have been able to release the pain of leaving a 10 year marriage and allow a new space of forgiveness to emerge.
I feel great and full: GRATEFUL for the possibility of moving forward.
Knowing that everything that happens in my life is perfectly as it should be.
There are no regrets. Only deep life lessons and compassion for what it means to be human.
South Africa has been the place for me to unravel my old story – to understand my mistakes, rebuild a new me and gain acceptance for all that is and all that will be.
Early last year a thunderbolt by the name of Thor arrived in my life. I knew something magical was about to happen. It was almost as if my whole life had prepared me for meeting this human being who would change my life and move my heart to landscapes I’ve only ever dreamed of.
He sowed seeds within my weary and fragile heart. I had no idea they would need the African sun to germinate and birthed in the rich soil of this sacred land. My time here hasn’t always been easy. I’ve had to face myself head on, while scratching and peeling back the old layers of pain and confrontation. I’ve had to dance with my shadow and work out how to integrate her into my new self-expression.
My time here has also been the most rewarding of my life. While unwrapping the emotional debris, I achieved something beyond my wildest dreams: I published my first book entitled An Open Relationship, and recorded my first album of original songs.
This whole process has tested my vulnerability and commitment to following through with my dreams and aspirations. As I showed up to meet myself head on, I am honoured and privileged to have had this opportunity to express this deep creativity that has been brewing within me for the past ten years.
South Africa, your wide open spaces have held me all the way through. Your ocean has cleansed my being and soothed my soul. Your rivers have washed my grief away. Your beaches have held my old worn out stories, which now lay in each grain of sand. Your mountains have nourished and provided me with the medicine I’ve needed in each naked footstep. I have bathed in the magnificence of your milky way and your forests have grounded me.
Your sun has thawed my heart to step deeper into a new love story. Africa, you are my home that calls and reminds me that we are always free. You have allowed me to heal my wounds, to bare my vulnerability over every terrain and taught me to know that I am enough.
As I prepare to move to Copenhagen to write a new chapter, I feel ready
to leap forward into the next part of my journey. It feels like I’m coming full circle as I move north to connect to my Viking and Danish ancestors.
I feel great and full: GRATEFUL for the possibility of moving forward, and knowing that everything that happens in my life is perfectly as it should be. There are no regrets. Only deep life lessons and compassion for what it means to be human. All that is left is the affirmation that, through all vulnerability, there is power. The essence of being loving, is to be vulnerable.
My prayer for this next road ahead is to gracefully meet each moment with courage and presence. I am ready to allow myself the space to be vulnerable, as I learn a new language and spread out my newfound wings.
