It’s been a long journey to get here. The last three months have been a wild ride, like a million marathons in my body, mind, and spirit. I spent some weeks in Cape Town running my retreat, looking after my 92-year-old grandmother and being a mom to two lively boys. I then got to spend a month in Costa Rica working at Rythmia where this story unfolds. I have recently landed back in Denmark to find out that I was offered a full-time teaching position at Copenhagen International School as a PE Teacher and said, ‘Yes!’ It’s only been in the last few days that I have had the chance to digest and understand the deep lessons and learning throughout my time in Costa Rica and how perfectly life can thread the dots together, which in turn, creates the tapestry of one’s life plan.
Before I take you with me to the Rythmia ‘Life Advancement Centre’ in Costa Rica, I need to set the stage and explain what bought me to this pivotal point in my journey. In 2006, after my first Burning Man Festival, a friend handed me a book called The Shaman’s Last Apprentice by Rebekah Shaman. This book led me to discover the powerful healing properties of the Amazonian vine/tea ayahuasca. This ancient Shamanic tea is a medicinal plant, used by shamans for healing people with physical ailments, addictions and emotional troubles. Shamans (Ayahuasqueros) also use the brew to enable the expansion of consciousness and connecting with our Soul. The story is that it was first used for guidance when hunting in the Amazon; it was said to enhance intuition and connection to surroundings. It has also been used to discover the healing properties in many other plants and to see and understand illness on a spiritual level and how our thoughts create our reality.
When the opportunity to work at Rythmia this summer presented itself, it felt like the universe was orchestrating itself into alignment. I was very excited to work at Rythmia, as it is the first medically recognized plant-medicine retreat centers in the world.
Before one embarks on a medicine journey, one needs to go through a process of cleansing both body and mind. The guidelines for this are not set in stone, and they vary from shaman to shaman. In most places, it involves fasting for 5-6 hours before the ceremony and abstaining from fermenting foods, sugar, alcohol, red meat, drugs, sex, and processed food for two weeks before and after the ceremony or retreat.
My first encounter with the vine was and still is the most profound experience I have ever encountered. Known words do not feel adequate to even begin to unravel the intricate nature and intelligence of this plant kingdom. The spirit of the plant moved deep within me and I was able to face myself completely for the first time. I felt as though I was experiencing a death – the death of my ego. At times it was dark and intense. I had to face my fears and travel within my physical body, into the cells and atoms that make up who I am.
Before my first medicine experience, I had a very bad injury affecting both my ankles. I was scheduled to have an operation, which would include cutting the tendons from my knees and rebuilding the lateral ligaments in my ankles. Mother Ayahuasca showed me how my ankles were all related to a lack of control in teenage years and how certain traumas were manifesting physically in my body. I felt the medicine working within my ligaments and restoring them. I worked with my fears and the shame and guilt that were still held within my cellular memory.
Since my first meeting with the Mother, I have been working closely along this sacred path for 12 years and it’s been a profound journey to date and one that cannot be put into a small blog entry. It will be told in my next book, Dance with the Vine of the Death. I also never
had to have the operation on my ankles and my ankles are now strong and healthy.
When the opportunity to work at Rythmia this summer presented itself, it felt like the universe was orchestrating itself into alignment. I was very excited to work at Rythmia, as it is the first medically recognized plant-medicine retreat centers in the world. After 5 flights and 3 days of travel, I landed at Liberia Airport, Costa Rica, in full humidity and knew that something very deep was about to be revealed and birthed.
Approximately 70-80 people walk through its doors each week to undergo the Rythmia Way, ‘Finding your Miracle.’ They come from all over the world; people who have never heard of plant medicines, corporate workgroups, people searching for healing, those working with addiction – they all come as they are in search of finding a way back to themselves.
The week consists of 4 plant-medicine journeys followed by 3 breathwork ceremonies. This is threaded together alongside daily yoga, organic food, steam rooms, colonic cleanses and meditation. It is all housed in the backdrop of Costa Rican nature with its howler monkeys, iguanas, dragonflies, butterflies, birds of prey and the hum of Mother Nature in her wild unkempt form.
My first encounter with the vine was and still is, the most profound experience I have ever encountered. Known words do not feel adequate to even begin to unravel the intricate nature and intelligence of this plant kingdom. The spirit of the plant moved deep within me and I was able to face myself completely for the first time.
My month at Rythmia provided so much insight into the world of business and medicine plants, seeing if these two worlds can meet side by side with integrity and harmony.
On a personal level, I had the pleasure and opportunity to meet some incredible human beings and co-workers who walk this road less travelled in honour of helping humanity and being in service. I also had the chance to deepen my relationship with the medicine and I had some truly incredible and revealing journeys.
It did, however, leave me with a very difficult flavour to digest. Many of the things I witnessed at Rythmia were truly amazing: 5-star service, the setting, food, spa, location, breath-of-life program, and wonderful staff.
The difficult part is not easy to write about, as it’s not my intention to badmouth anyone, yet more to share my concerns. My commitment is to speak my truth and not hold back. My intention for this writing comes from my humble point of view, in wanting to protect the medicine and how it is used.
At Rythmia there are almost 80-90 people at the ceremony each night, which I feel is too many for the space designed and it was not held safely. What do I mean by not held safely?
The Shamans that I met at Rythmia were doing an amazing job considering the setup and the working arrangements in which they had to work. I was working in most ceremonies each night and in all honesty, with such a large group, there were not enough thorough medical and emotional screenings of the guests before coming into the retreat. I felt that there were a lot of people who were not suitable to do this work.
Each night, a different shaman leads the ceremony and again, this leaves no continuity from which to work. There was no live music in the ceremonies – only via playlists, which for me was painful. It felt like there was no guidance. Only on the last night, there was a taste of real ceremony when the Columbians brought their teachings, songs, feathers, and healing.
Each guest is sold the promise of ‘getting their “Miracle” by following three simple procedures: Show me who I have become, Merge me back with my Soul and Heal my heart.’ I feel the expectations of these intentions are pushed so much that people feel almost forced to have their miracle. It also felt like the notion of playing GOD. One thing I know to be true about the teaching from the forest is it’s all about surrender and dropping expectations. It’s about creating your own intentions and working in small groups.
Approximately 70-80 people walk through its doors each week to undergo the Rythmia Way, ‘Finding your Miracle.’ They come from all over the world; people who have never heard of plant medicines, corporate workgroups, people searching for healing, those working with addiction – they all come as they are in search of finding a way back to themselves.
I found it very hard to be honest, as everything needs to be shown and done in the Rythmia way, which feels contradictory to the path of honesty and integration of this work. I also feel that this approach of a 5-star ayahuasca factory Landmark-Forum-style of teaching can be very dangerous in these changing times where plant medicines are widely available.
For the person that comes to Rythmia, who has done a lot of self-work and worked with plant medicines before, it is as equally beneficial to those who have never walked this path before. I don’t feel this can be reached when you have 80- 90 guests moving in and out each week with no pause and no rest, simply making sure that you are number one on TripAdvisor.
I did witness some amazing transformations within the month; I had the great pleasure of meeting an amazing blind woman who was, in my eyes, an angel. Her courage and strength to navigate through each day and night was so inspiring to witness. I had the chance to share with spoken word the world around her and be her eyes and describe things to her. The gift of meeting her was extraordinarily inspiring to me. It reminded me of how much we take for granted including our senses.
I think there are many ways to connect with ourselves, and many ways to find peace and harmony within. My hope is that Rythmia can become simpler and have smaller groups. I think there are a lot of good things happening, yet one needs to be very careful when working with medicine plants. I don’t feel it is a business and needs to be treated in a very sacred way.
I found it very hard to be honest, as everything needs to be shown and done in the Rthymia way, which feels contradictory to the path of honesty and integration of this work.
I feel incredibly grateful for the path I walk and the teaching that this summer has bestowed on me has been a true blessing. I now have a full-time job teaching and working with children again, which is truly wonderful. Being a mother to three amazing boys and seeing how they have all adopted the new family constellation is inspiring. Having a wonderful partner who continues to love, support and show up for me, is a gift.
For me, the phases of life arrive in seven-year cycles; within the seven-year cycles, there are individual years. During the years there are seasons, and within the seasons there are months, weeks, days and hours. Within the hours there are minutes, and within the minutes come seconds, and with every second comes a moment. Each moment comes only once, so it is my aim to live in each moment as truly as I can to my heart’s yearning.
Each moment is filled with the magic truth of love; this can transform us, heal the planet and bring peace to the world. Each moment comes with only one choice: love or fear. I choose love.